Machines Versus Latino Servants -- Cont'd
Advances in robotics means that the U.S. faces a hard choice on whether to shift from Latino servants to machines. The LBT's Schultz and Katzenberg duke it out to find the answer.
2. Maintenance and Expense
Case For Latinos
By CHARLES C. SCHULTZ
In 1980, NASA hailed the space shuttle program as the biggest advance for space exploration in a generation. We know how that ended. The space shuttle might have looked good on paper, but maintenance costs rendered it impractical.
So now when the good professor tells us that we are going to rely on millions of walking talking manikins to care for our children and elderly, I say look at the space shuttle program. One leaky gasket and grandma falls down the stairs. One minor malfunction and disaster strikes. Junior’s family jewels turn into testicular tartare during a routine diaper change.
Who is going to maintain all of these complicated robots? We have enough trouble maintaining the machines that we already have. Every time I take my Audi in to be serviced I have nightmares about the invoice.
Case For Machines
By PROF. L. CLEMENT SAMUELSON
Machines are complicated? How about humans? My friend asks how we are going to maintain all these robots – not “machines” – but do not humans require maintenance? At least with machines we can throw them out when the cost of maintenance exceeds the cost of the new model. What happens when Jorge’s sloppy lifting technique ruptures a disc in his back? How cheap is back surgery on a human? Cheaper than replacing a gasket? Or even the robot's replacement cost? I think not.
Medicare and Medicaid will go bankrupt as it is. Our Latino servant class by in large pays no income tax because they do not make nearly enough money. We will pay for their medical care and it will cost us dearly. And if they reproduce, fogetaboutit, as the Italians say.
I say we keep a few thousand Latinos and teach them how to repair robots. Send the rest home. Then we are on easy street.
