Using A Walker No Cause For Panic; Defrauding Husbands Call For Counseling Of Legal Variety
Widely known as the finest dating and romance coach for women on the West Coast, M. Rudolph Katzenberg has been helping single women past their “best served by” date find love since 2003. Many of his distinguished alumnae have had a baby and then divorced, received highly favorable marital dissolution agreements or just had a fully-paid nice meal with an inoffensive suitor. Katzenberg is the author of “A Thinking Woman's Guide to Dating After You’re Approaching Menopause.”
Dr. Katzenberg,
I have been holding out for Mr. Right but lately I am getting worried I will never find him. I’m starting to think that maybe I should settle. In my 20s, I was busy partying and dating guys I could not see myself with long-term. In my 30s, I met a lot of “nice guys” that seemed like they might have been good partners, but they just didn’t do it for me and I have always refused to settle. During my 40s, I spent a lot of time fighting my way up the corporate ladder. OK, I also had a few girls’ nights out, but I never met anyone that came close to getting me excited. The same holds true for my 50s and 60s. This brings us to today.
I still feel young, and my friends tell me that I look like I could be in my 50s. One month ago, I started using a walker so I’m worried that guys will be superficial and rule me out because of this.
So I guess my question is, should I give up looking for Mr. Right? Is there ever a time to just settle?
Conflicted
Dear “Conflicted,”
I’ll answer your question with a question. Do you feel any less fabulous than when you were when you were 25? No? Then why should you settle? Do you really believe that you should settle just because it has taken time to find the right person for you? That is no reason to settle. Many active and sexy ladies use walkers. I know because my mother is one of them, and she is one sassy woman with no lack of interested men! As long as you carry yourself with confidence you will be fine. Just think of your walker as a sign of stability. With the right mindset, you will find your Mr. Right. Just be patient and don’t settle! Life is too short.
Rudy
Dr. Katzenberg,
I have been married to my husband for 8 years now. When we first got married I thought he was so cool with how he interacted with people around him. He was funny and people respected him. He made me proud to be around him. Last year he lost his job and struggled to find a new one. This experience made me lose so much respect for him. His whole personality changed. People view him differently now because he never jokes around anymore. Last week he told me that maybe I should go back to work so that we can make ends meet. The worst: he uses the fact that he supported me through my doctorate in child psychology as a excuse to bring up the subject. My child psychology degree was to explore my own personal issues, not to start working again.
I feel like I have been the victim of a bait and switch. Do I have any recourse for this? Should I confront him about his 180-degree turn? Maybe the worst is that four-year-old pug has to witness this.
Victim
Dear “Victim,”
It sounds like you need an attorney. Many men prey on the innocence of women. I have seen it more times than I care to remember. Such men sweet talk their prey and put up a facade during the courtship process. Only after the wedding bells have silenced do these fraudsters show their true selves. They deserve whatever they had coming to them. If you thought that your husband was a success when in reality he is a complete dud, our legal system gives you recourse.
Not having met your husband it's hard for me to confirm my suspicions, but a trained family law attorney should be able to make the proper assessment after a full consultation.
Rudy
