Single Ladies: You Need To Lower Your Expectations In Your Dating Market Value
Saturday, September 28, 2013 at 5:47PM
Prof. L. Clement Samuelson is a professor of sexual psychology at Santa Marino College. He also provides dating consulting services to local single men in Santa Marino and has published over 15 books concerning dating for single men.
As my readers and clients know, I primarily provide dating advice to males of all ages and levels of mating acumen. From time to time though I like to offer some dating advice to women. After all they are half of the dating equation.
Today I would like to offer a simple and concise piece of advice that will help all single women find long-term dating happiness and perhaps even – dare I even say it – marital bliss.
Here’s the message: aim lower.
That’s right, I said it. That was not a typo. Aim lower. Let me be even more explicit: AIM LOWER!!!
True, this runs counter to every message you ever heard from your parents, teachers, single girlfriends and popular entertainment.
Please allow me to illustrate my message with a simple parable. Let’s say that you’re a single woman who is “ambitious,” “strong,” and “intelligent.” You worked very hard for your success and you want to drive a car that shows off what you have accomplished.
On the way home from a shopping trip to Beverly Hills, you pass by a corner used-car lot and leasing center called Beverly Hills Auto Sport on Burton Way. In the front you see parked a bright red Ferrari 458 Spider convertible. You think to yourself, “This is the car! This is what I deserve.”
You park your more modest two-door, 2005 Audi A4 sedan in one of the four guest spaces on the lot. Inside is the Persian son of the owner – named “Aref” – who looks at you with some suspicion. He informs you that the car sells for $228,000, which is a bargain considering that they are difficult to find and brand-new they are $260,000-plus.
You tell him that maybe you just want to try the car out for a little while. After some haggling, you agree that you will lease the car for a week for $5,000 and a deposit of $50,000 on your platinum American Express card in case of a fender bender.
All of a sudden, your life changes. Everyone looks at you at stop lights. You get invited to exciting events, and your friends are very, very jealous. You roll the lease over at the end of each week.
At the same time, however, your bank account is dwindling down. As much as you try, you’re not able to increase your income to make the car a long term possibility. Also, Aref alerts you to a clause in your lease agreement that allows him and his brothers to use your car on weekends. You feel bitter when their girlfriends shed arm hair on your passenger seat.
On the verge of bankruptcy, with great sadness you return the car and return to your commonplace, aging black Audi A4.
But after the Ferrari you find that your Audi is not the same. The engine doesn’t make that exciting whirring noise. Your panties do not moisten at stoplights when young men in late-model Mercedes check you out. Invites to the hottest parties stop coming. You are so, so unhappy now. This is not what you deserve.
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